Are you an introvert or extrovert?
This is Part I of a series on conversation.
I met a girl the other day. The conversation began like most others. She introduced herself as Claire, extending her hand. I, Zach, accepting it. We continued on, batting back and forth the typical get-to-know you questions. I learned she isn't from here. She learned I am. I learned she works as a travel nurse. She learned I work at a startup. I learned she likes tequila. She learned I like vodka.
This was normal, if not a tad dry. I tossed back a sip of my grapefruit vodka.
Then she threw a screwball, "Would you say you're an introvert or extrovert?"
Ooooh taking it meta, I like this. Okay, I bite.
"Introvert," I flashed a half-smile. "Extroverted introvert," I continued after a pause.
Besides being an answer begging for more questions, I actually believe what I said. I am an extroverted introvert. Pay mind to the adj-noun pairing here; I am NOT an introverted extrovert.
Oh grammar schmammer. I don't mean to be a pedantic puppeteer of words. What I mean is this: nouns define something; adjectives modify nouns. Introvert defines me; extrovert modifies the introvert, me. This will become important in Part II.
For now, let’s talk about what it even means to be an introvert or extrovert. We differentiate introverts and extroverts by how they gain energy: introverts from solitude, extroverts from social interactions. That lends use to one specific context; it answers the question: how do you gain energy?
If you're an extrovert, you gain energy in social interactions
If you're an introvert, you gain energy in solitude.
You already knew this though. So let’s ask a more interesting question:
What happens if you're in a social interaction?
If you're an extrovert in a social interaction, you… talk.
If you're an introvert in a social interaction, you… listen.
In Part II we’ll dive deeper into the types of conversations that take place when you mix and match introverts and extroverts. For the time being, I leave you to fill in the puzzle:
